MANDEVILLE — In a surprise press conference Wednesday morning, a residential water meter in Old Mandeville publicly admitted it has been “mostly guessing” for years.
The meter, located outside a home near Lakeshore Drive, told reporters it initially intended to measure water usage accurately but eventually began making what it described as “educated estimates based largely on vibes.”
“I’d see someone watering their lawn and think, ‘That looks expensive,’” the meter said. “Other months I’d just spin a little slower because I was tired.”
The confession reportedly came after an independent audit of the city’s utility system prompted several meters to reconsider their professional ethics.
Residents reacted with mixed emotions.
“I knew it,” said one Sanctuary homeowner. “There is absolutely no way I used that much water during the month we were on vacation.”
City officials declined to confirm whether other meters might also be improvising but encouraged residents not to interrogate utility infrastructure.
Experts cautioned against jumping to conclusions, noting that most water meters continue to perform their duties faithfully and have never held a press conference.
As of press time, the meter had retained legal counsel and released a brief statement clarifying that any resemblance between its estimates and actual water usage “should be considered purely coincidental.”
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